#I saw that... interesting gifset the other day

[sugiiis]

Do I get to ask you the questions in person?

So where are you taking me?

@sugiiis

i wanted to take you out :(

[moonshynecybin]

hmmm idk if this is anything, but rosquez as romcom co stars that keep getting cast together even though they hateee each other but the chemistry is too good?

this is fun because like. it keeps some of my favorite little rosquez saw traps and wraps them up for me like a little treat. forced proximity public pda and EXTREME media scrutiny kind of their bread and butter tbh. make them crazy make them kiss im watching like tashi in the hotel scene in challengers

like marc as a young tom cruise esque (sorry. SORRY. im sorryyyyy) action star who does all of his own stunts loves the physicality of acting loves getting to pretend to do crazy stuff and be a HEROOOO but still kind of plays the same exact character every time. BIG smile always standing on apple boxes to make himself seem taller as he attempts to generate chemistry with whatever actress is his badly written love interest of the day (marc would be SO good in the mission impossible movies im sorry he WOULD be like. can i parachute off of a motorcycle into a ravine please please please youre NOTHING. santi is his extremely stressed stunt coordinator. lmao.) versus vale who came up doing indie movies as a teen in the 90s (his lil face would DOMINATE gay cinephile gifset tumblr) before launching himself to super stardom with a string of successful comedies and sort of settling into that because its easy... secretly frustrated no one will let him bust out his drama chops... BIG chip on his shoulder here a la leaving honda for yamaha etc

so eventually both of them are getting a little tired of being pigeon holed. and decide 2 book a serious ass gay romantic drama. they are tired of being hailed as the kings of fiction for the masses and they want to win at acting!! they get into the chemistry read (marc is still pretty young i think) and its. insane. INSTANT. james dean and marlon brando levels of ARE YOU TWO FUCKING?? but they literally just met. and marc has been a fan of vale's forever but not just the comedies also his earlier dramatic stuff (apocalyptic little gay crush) and they have similar taste in movies and vale is sooooo funny and it is OFF to the races. like. i cannot emphasize this enough they are fucking the WHOLE time. every scene in this movie its just leaping off the screen... they go in to film and its like that BTS clip of the americans where the director was having matthew rhys and keri russell do a sex scene and theyre suspiciously comfortable pretending to 69 and he turns to his assistant and just goes. oh yeah these guys have fucked. they are wayyyy to comfy hitching the other's pussy into their face lmao. just fucking going for it. the director is like hey guys. can you tone it down a little. marc biggggg smile okayyyyyy :3

and the movie comes out and they attend the premiere all smiley and bouncy and feeling really good about the project and then, theyy watch it. and its like. uh oh! not a lot of acting happening there ! um. best performance of either of their careers and they both look at it an can identify all the points they werent acting like evil little signal flares.... and vale shuts marc out HARD yadayadayada the Usual Rosquez Breakup Ensues.... until they both get cast in a revival of the brokeback mountain stage play and shit pops off in the most nuclear explosion of horny heartbreak to ever hit the STAGE…

[lover-of-mine]

I know that you've already gotten about a million asks like this already, but I'm also a person who joined because I vaguely heard of the hype of Bi Buck. I kinda joined the fandom at a time and in a corner of the fandom when people were just so happy to have Bi Buck that they were super excited about his relationship with Tommy. But even as someone who had truly zero context besides a few gifsets of them together and some posts, I still thought "oh, so Tommy is basically just Buck's love interest and nothing else? That's kinda sad that the fandom can't get a truly fulfilling queer ship. He's not even that charming, they just have to pretend because Bucktommy is more than they've ever gotten." (again, this is before I knew of Hen and Karen).

Later, I started to watch the show from the beginning and saw a few posts about Buddie and I was hooked from the first edit! It's wild to me that anyone can ship Bucktommy over Buddie past the initial joy of representation. Personally, I'd choose the friends-to-lovers, slowburn, matching each others' freak, having each others' backs, and whatever the entire shooting arc was over "at least they're currently canon" every day.

Honestly, it's kinda sad the way people just settled for rep for the sake of rep when the show does have good queer representation. And honestly, we are staring at what could be one of the best slowburns of network procedural history, you're dragging me off this ship kicking and screaming, settling for something just because it's canon when everything that buddie is is on the other side is so ????? to me.

[buddiebeginz]

WHY DID THEY SHOW EDDIE WATCHING BUCK REPEL DOWN THE CLIFF?! Choices and so early on too 😩

I'm assuming you're talking about this gifset I reblogged. Honestly I think that Eddie was supposed to be queer from the beginning. I know people think Buck was but I'm not sure if that was necessarily the writers intention. It might have been Oliver's intention to play him that way, I can't remember what he said word for word but I think it was something about how he's always seen Buck as bi. But I think in scenes like the season 1 tapeworm episode where Buck seems to bond with the gay couple it's supposed to come off more like Buck is just being his himbo self more than anything else. I mean I do think when we're looking back on the show there are definitely signs of his bisexuality (the tapeworm scene being one) but I don't know that the writers wrote him at the time with that intention.

But I think there's a good possibility that they brought Eddie in always wanting to have him be a character that comes out eventually. I mean look at how we're introduced to Eddie. Then look at how everything with Shannon was handled. They easily could have kept her around longer and turned their relationship into a will they/won't they. They could have made it so we saw how in love with her Eddie has always been but that's not what happened. They let us know right away that the main draw to that relationship for Eddie was familiarity and the fact that Shannon is Chris' mother. These factors have continued to come into play in Eddie's other relationships too. Like with Ana there was a familiarity in that she was Chris' teacher and Eddie was mostly looking for someone to fill the mother figure role for Chris.

While I think that Eddie was always intended to be queer I don't think they wanted him to come out immediately like they did with a character like Michael. I think the plan was to tell his story slowly and have him come out later. The Ana storyline I think was supposed to be the lead in to having Eddie come out. The main reason I believe this (apart from just look at how that storyline was handled) is the person on twitter with inside info to the show said as much.

I also think that around s3 they started to really notice the chemistry between Buck and Eddie and how much people were shipping them because that's when we got scenes like "there's no one in this world I trust with my son more" and "you want to go for the title" and the grocery story fight which totally read like a lovers quarrel. Or how they had Eddie seeing images of Buck flash in his mind when he almost died in the well. Or having Buck scream for Eddie when he almost died in the well.

I think by the time they got to season 4 there were serious discussions about putting Buck and Eddie together. We know from Oliver that the plan was originally to have Buck come out in s4 and presumably Eddie in s5 along with Buddie going canon. But Fox put a stop to that. If you go by what the insider said and by how season 4 was handled especially the shooting (which is incredibly romance coded) there's no way that Buddie wasn't in the plans by this point.

Plus you had Tim leaving around this time likely at least in part because he was frustrated with how Fox was stifling his show. You can also see remnants of where the story was supposed to go in s5. All that stuff with Eddie and Ana and the panic attacks and Buck being worried about him that was definitely supposed to be a part of Eddie's coming out arc I'm positive on that. I also think that Taylor (when she came back in s4) was originally just supposed to be a friend who helped Buck figure things out but instead Fox pushed for her to be a love interest. This would explain Oliver's dislike of the relationship and complete lack of supporting it. Similar to how he's been with B/T.

Anyway sorry I went off on a ramble. I could talk about these guys all day. 😅

Oh and I leave you with this anon Eddie in s3 checking out a hot guy's ass. (and Chimney clocking him doing it😝)

[platoapproved]

As a lesbian to a lesbian. Do you ever feel like youre missing a MAJOR point of the iwtv characters? Dont get me wrong im DEF obsessed with them and love them dearly. But the other day i saw a picture pf sam reid with short hair and was like “ah!! Scary!! What did they do to my boy!! I cant look at him like That” and then. I realized that hes actually probably very conveniently attractive like that?? AND AND AND like when everyone is just obsessed with these characters im like “oh hell yeah theyre pretty!! What interesting character design i cant look away! Wait wdym you wanna WHAT TO THAT MAN” like i just FORGET so often and i think my experience is fundamentally different from some peoples lmao

In the nicest way possible dear anon - can't relate to this at all! I am another person whose experience is fundamentally different to yours, even though we are both lesbians 😂 Life's a rich tapestry and all that.

For me, when I am engaging with fiction - whether it's a TV show or novel or anything - a HUGE part of the joy is fully leaving behind my own mind and identity and experience of the world. Simply put, there is no 'I' for me when I am watching IWTV or thinking about it or engaging with the fandom. It's completely disconnected from me as a human being and my experiences in the real world and the real life relationships I choose to seek out. Which is great! Because I love getting a break from those things and plunging head-first into something different and moving and narratively compelling.

So no, I don't really feel like I'm missing anything at all!

I would in fact easily and gleefully categorize myself as one of the 'everyone' who is 'just obsessed with these characters'! And I don't see that as incompatible with being a lesbian at all!

I LOVE when my mutuals, however they identify, tag gifsets/pics/whatever of IWTV men with things so filthy they could strip paint from a wall. I love that tumblr is a place where people can gleefully share their unhinged horny thoughts about fictional dudes and it makes me so happy seeing people expressing themselves in that way. There is no 'what do you mean' for me! I'm over here like, "yeah? tell me more! 😏"

The idea that any of this would be unavailable to me because I am a lesbian is very strange to me, and honestly a little sad. It seems limiting to me. It's one thing to just not enjoy / connect with something, but... idk. 🤷‍♀️

[esmes]

don't mind me - just some rainy day musings bc sweeney todd 2023 has rotted my brain

someone's tags on a gifset got me thinking about 2023 revival lovett and todd and the special something their dynamic has. there's something about this particular iteration of these characters and their relationship, especially as we see it evolve throughout the show (even as we've seen it evolve throughout the show's run), that just makes mrs lovett's betrayal and her death at his hands hit hard. i know, i know - she deserves it. she lies! she's a lying liar. her deceit is no small thing. any one of us would be incensed to have been misled the way she misleads sweeney. even if a small part of her may have done it, as she says, to spare him having to see what became of his lucy, the larger part was certainly to serve her own interests.

but there's something about how close mrs lovett gets to bringing sweeney around to her this time that just gets me carried away. they're not just business partners - they're lovers, they're co-conspirators, and they're sort of each other's only friend in the world. at this point, he indulges her flights of fancy. they know each other intimately. they joke with each other! he's likely had to listen to countless hours of her prattling on about her thoughts, hopes, and wishes. this is a man who, at this point in the show, is slitting people's throats without remorse. and yet he spends the evening on the sofa cleaning his pipe while he patiently listens to his girlfriend rave about a seaside wedding. when she takes his hand, he doesn't wrench himself from her grasp like he used to. he doesn't get up and walk out, which he could do. he accepts her - her presence, her company, her warmth. he may struggle to admit it to himself, but he does. he can concede that he loves her - just a little bit, though he can't quite bring himself to say the words. sweeney is fiercely loyal to lucy's memory, so much so that he clearly couldn't ever wholly give his heart to someone else, but, in that moment after "by the sea", you can see that he's softened toward lovett. they were both alone a long time before this, after all.

it's not the stuff of great love songs, but it's something. it's almost enough.

this is what ultimately makes the final living moments between them all the more heartbreaking. mrs lovett has always been a sympathetic character to me - a villain, sure, but not without her reasons. she's a woman alone in a brutal world. whether the character is an older or a younger iteration, she's been alone for a desperately long time. when sweeney returns to her after all this time, she sees her moment and she takes it. she's not letting her second chance at life get away from her without a few claw marks.

when sweeney kills her, he sheds no tears over it - but the grudging fondness we'd seen him beginning to feel toward her only serves to emphasize how monstrous of a deception it is. his "you LIED to me" comes out in an anguished roar. when he throws her in that oven, all the light goes out from the world. it takes my breath away every time. though it should, it doesn’t quite feel like justice.

i know not everyone loves annaleigh's interpretation, but i have maintained from the first time i saw this revival that the warmth she brings, the honeyed, deluded, comical sweetness that lures sweeney into believing life with her could be tolerable, if not ideal, was a brilliant choice.

that's why the leap into hell together works for me. some productions have had sweeneys that barely tolerate their lovetts, so a cold diverging of paths makes sense. these two definitely fall into a different category. it makes sense to me for this sweeney and lovett's ultimate fate to be each other. who else would it be? lucy did nothing wrong - she's not going where he's going. having made lovett pay for her lies, they can head on down (hand in unlovable hand!!!!!!!) to live out the almost-enough life they created with each other. and sure, her chirping his ear off for eternity would certainly make an appropriate punishment for his crimes.

[lurking-latinist]

would be very interested in hearing more about hornblower/ship and/or hornblower s1e1 fic!

Hornblower/Ship originated from that gifset where he looks longingly out at the Hotspur through the lace curtains (when he is supposed to be with Maria). In the tags I was like “that is not just a man wanting to be elsewhere, that is how you film a shot of a man looking at his true and secret love, that is a man who is having an affair with a boat” and then I said something about Doctor/TARDIS being the top end of the scale of ship romance but Hornblower can get pretty high up there, and then I remembered the episode of Doctor Who where the TARDIS gets put into a human body (“she’s a woman. And she’s the TARDIS” / “did you wish *really* hard?”) and they kiss, and now William Bush is having a real awkward time:

It had been a long, hard few weeks for every man from captain to powder-monkey; an indecisive action followed immediately by a tremendous storm had left the Lydia badly injured, and they might have been in serious danger had they not chanced upon an uncharted island which turned out to be well-watered and well-wooded both. The captain had puzzled over the island—how it could possibly have escaped other navigators—but had worked as hard as any man in refitting the ship. Perhaps harder: the men said they heard noises, swore the place was haunted, and each refused to go anywhere without a mate. Bush, phlegmatic as ever, had heard nothing, had kept the men to their work regardless, and a remarkable proportion of the ship’s fabric was now composed of the island’s wood. “Sir?” Bush called, rapping on the door of the captain’s cabin for a second time. “You asked to see me?” There was a muffled noise from within, which Bush interpreted as a request to enter. He smiled to himself, picturing the captain dropping asleep over his logbook or charts; heaven knew he needed the rest. He entered and immediately retreated again. He saw—but it was impossible—the captain had a woman on his knee. On his knee, on his shoulder, all over him… Bush was capable of infinite discretion, though it was rarely necessary with Captain Hornblower, but where on earth had she come from? The captain obviously noticed Bush’s confusion, and, thoroughly confused himself, attempted to carry off the situation. “Mr Bush, this is Miss—Miss Lydia—” Evidently he didn’t know her surname; obviously the acquaintance was thoroughly irregular. When had she come aboard? How had she come aboard? “Lydia, my dear, this is—” “My First Lieutenant,” she said, throwing herself from Hornblower’s arms towards him. The ship rocked to one side at the same time and she landed firmly in his arms, planting a kiss on him. She tasted of salt. Bush disengaged her and she returned, happily enough it seemed, to the captain’s side. He didn’t have quite the look of thundering jealousy that Bush expected. He just looked at Lydia like a lovestruck schoolboy. Honestly, Bush was no longer sure what he expected; the young woman had left him completely uncertain.

The island was going to turn out to be ~magic and the wood from there was going to have made her sentient/human. Like the Argo in mythology. I went with Lydia because she has a lady's name, but I don't have a good enough grip on the characters in that era to write any more (or perhaps even to write this much, but there it is).

S1E1 fic was meant to be some kind of character study, framed as Pellew getting a report from Lt Eccleston about his new crew. Eccleston thought the whole enterprise was rather silly though:

"So that accounts for the petty officers you have brought me," said Captain Pellew, briefly consulting a paper; "now what of the midshipmen?" "There are four of them," Eccleston began, and nearly closed his statement there. He had never at any time considered an individual midshipman since the happy, now quite distant day when he had received his own commission; on the Justinian they were nuisances en masse, inevitable nuisances, so that one might as well discuss the individual qualities of the ship's rats. Yet something in the gleam of the new Captain's eye told him that this attitude, which had made so much sense on Justinian, would not fit in on Indefatigable. "Mostly stupid, I'm afraid, sir," he added.

[thesunsethour]

had the most infuriating class today. it was on adaptations of sherlock holmes. there are ENDLESS possibilities for discussion here. how does victorian homosociality appear in a modern day adaptation? how does the fin-de-siècle class structure get adapted in modern day london? how do our shared cultural perceptions of holmes impact the way writers adapt conan-doyle’s stories today? do you want to guess what people talked most about. it was 2014 tumblr. a good hour of *masters’ students* being like “haha i was a child of 2014 tumblr and so obviously sherlock was gay for watson i think our shared understanding of sherlock holmes is looking at gifsets of them staring at each other and reading fanfic on tumblr” YOU ARE DOING A MASTERS DEGREE IN LITERATURE. i don’t even care if you’re going to bring up tumblr in class (but please have a sense of shame) but only if you are going to make actual interesting nuanced points. how did fandom culture change our perception of holmes? do you think the lack of explicit romantic tension in the show was a cowardly move on behalf of the show runners? how is sexuality treated in the show? what fanfic tropes are applied most, why do we think that is, and how does that relate to the core text that it is based on?

i must confess i never understood the appeal of sherlock in the way i did supernatural or doctor who. but i was around back then. i saw what everyone was doing. i get it. but i also recognise that in a discussion class for a masters degree maybe we should be broadening our horizons a bit.

also the “haha i was on tumblr in 2014” jokes are sooo not funny. girl some of us are still here. my mutuals and i are all college graduates now. we have degrees and jobs and an appreciation for nuance. take my stupid website’s name out of your mouth

[add1ctedt0you]

ChengQing for the ask game?

Ship It

What made you ship it?

Your posts lol. No, but seriously! I watched the donghua, then I read a ton of fics ( mostly Xicheng fics lol, being jiang cheng most popular ship on ao3) and then I read the novel, so I never even thought about them as a thing. Then, jc brainrot made me install Tumblr and I saw one of your gifset! I didn't quite ship them back then, but the more I thought about it, the more I could see the appeal! So, now, is one my top three ship! Also, this art lives rent free in my head. Idk why, I just like it!

What are your favorite things about the ship?

The families feud plus the noncon of it all lol. I like how both of them are complicit in each other's loved ones deaths! Wen Qing looked the other way while the jiang were massacred, jiang cheng did the same (if not worse, if you think that he actively participated in the wen remnants killing!)

I like thinking about them struggling so much to connect, because it's my favorite kind of relationship and because I think it works quite well with them?? Out of the other characters, imo, they could understand each other as no one else!

Both are pragmatic leaders, put in dire situations from almost the first time we encounter them. Both can read a room and understand where the wind is blowing... So, I think, they will look at each other, pondering the other's choices and think... 'yeah, I'll have done that too' (thanks cql for validating me!). So, their mutual understanding, plus their compassion (wen qing) and ability to get over something for loved ones sake (jiang cheng), create an interesting dynamic!

Also. She rearranged his guts. He's her greatest creation! People thought wen qing was a crazy bitch for theorizing a golden core's transfer (while clutching in fear their stomach so hard). And she managed it! She proved them wrong!!! Wen Qing should wake up every day looking at the face of the man she reinvented. I don't make the rules.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Mmm, I think my unpopular (???) opinion is about how they work together. Wen Qing is kinda momming her ill softhearted brother (cql!wq more, but the novel hints at it too imo), she works for years under her megalomaniac uncle and then, girl has to take care of her family (plus an alcoholic wei wuxian). Let her rest! Let someone take care of her!!!

And tbh, jiang cheng's problem isn't that he has too much responsibility (like, yeah, it's a problem lol. But imo, taking care of his sect it's jiang cheng's way to show love), his problem is that no one (wei wuxian) really let him take care of them! Let him have someone to pamper with his embarrassing devotion!

[ajaxbell]

Maiden Holmes: the jianghu Scooby Gang is on the case!

I picked this cdrama up simply because of Zhang Linghe's face and because I saw a gifset of the kisses. But what an unexpected delight!

The premise is essentially a woman, Su Ci, disguised as a man to become a cop with a secret agenda to investigate the false charges that killed her family. While investigating a case she teams up with war traumatized Prince Qi who has his own problems at court. But in a mistaken identity romp she doesn't recognize him (while she's also carrying around comics of his adventures lol). They are joined by young woman doctor/poisoner/coroner/forensic pathologist, and by the world's greatest himbo. Together they form a jianghu Scooby Gang and solve a bunch of seemingly unrelated cases that start to connect to each other, and conveniently connect to both Su Ci's ultimate goal and Prince Qi's problems at court.

The villain is obvious and over the top. The plot is wobbly at best. But the cast really saves this show. Zhang Linghe is way better than he has any business being in his first drama, just fresh out of engineering college. He outshines all the more established actors in the cast. But over all the cast has chemistry and the story hits the right notes of found family, of a team of experts competently doing their respective jobs, and manages the comedy they are given well (the more dramatic and intense emotional beats are as wobbly as the plot).

These characters are a group of kind, interested people who seem to do their best for the victims they encounter. But they also each go through their own emotional moments in realistic ways, shutting out their friends, and isolating. But every time the friends show up, offer true support, and receive apologies for not being initially trusted or let in. There's an ongoing theme of being both accepted for who you truly are and of being loved for it whether platonically or romantically. And this is really the core of what makes this show better than it should be.

There's something just very sweet and good-natured about their friendships and how they treat each other and everyone in need they encounter. It makes this show a joy to watch and honestly a bit uplifting. Like at the end of rough day sitting down to see these friends be nice and helpful and concerned just really felt like a balm. And while the rougher emotional points didn't always hit, a lot of them did, due entirely to this cast and how well they made me feel they were really friends. Most the comedy beats are right and truly funny, but also the comedy never hits a mean or punching down note either. Which for me ends up being part of what actually made this show great for me: it's actually really subversive.

Is it subversive on purpose or accidentally? I'll never know but it was really enjoyable. The first half watches like a good bl. Yes it's based on the misunderstanding of Prince Qi believing Su Ci is a man. But that does not stop Prince Qi from standing too close and looking sick with longing. It doesn't stop the classic cdrama underwater 'kiss' to share breath. Zhang Linghe plays this without any indication that it might be weird or uncomfortable for Prince Qi to be attracted to a man. While the show plays it for comedy, the comedy is Su Ci being really confused about what is happening, and in their friends' response to (perceived male) Su Ci and Prince Qi as a couple.

Even more subversive, while it's played (joyfully) for comedy, all the friends' responses are uniformly welcoming and supportive of these two 'men' becoming involved. Particularly the world's most delightful himbo character making an impassioned speech about his support of them. (Truly not just for this scene, but this himbo character is maybe one of my all time favorite TV characters? Just incredible work by the script and the actor.)

Eventually Su Ci's gender is revealed and Prince Qi takes it without blinking and goes to work to make this world more feminist and accepting so she can continue do her job as a detective for the court even after her gender is exposed. After this point in the show the script weakens a bit, sacrificing some character development to making people act the way the plots needs rather than totally true to the established characters. But throughout Prince Qi seems to not care about gender, or any outside perception of his relationship regardless of the gender of his partner. And it was just relief a to watch. What a good character he turns out to be. So supportive of anything his partner wants, in a way where he seems to truly enjoy anything she does, and just looks so pleased with how smart she is. He looks pleased for people to think he's in a gay relationship. He looks pleased when she does her job well. He looks pleased when she dresses up for him. And some of this has to be Zhang Linghe's acting work. Especially when he starts bring a level of smolder and longing that seems possibly (and I'm not complaining) overly steamy for the lightweight comedy level of this show.

Anyway I would absolutely call this show queer friendly and accepting in a way crossdressing deception plots often never achieve. That combined with these kind, good-natured friends, and the world's best himbo character really combined to make this a fun, sweet watch. So yes, I'd recommend, but don't go into expecting quality, or consistency, but it is sweet, light, and fun. Just a little treat to balance out the darker things in the world if you need distraction.

[chalkrevelations]

The thing. The thing is.

Here's the thing:

Yeah, "Who's a good boy?" and feeding him out of a dog bowl and "I'm your pet, aren't I?" but I dunno. I feel like the really untapped well is taking the pet/puppy/dog stuff between Vegas and Pete - both what's explicit in the show and what fandom's accreted on top of it - and laying that over Kinn and Pete (or maybe even Kinn and Porsche, and now I'm also thinking of Kinn and Big) is where some of the real excavation of these characters and their relationship dynamics could happen.

I have to poke at this some more. I just know that I saw a VP gifset the other day using the dog metaphor and was struck by the thought: "This would be 100x more of a punch in the face if the same text was laid over gifs of Kinn and Pete."

I bet you could also do a lot of interesting work by laying quite a bit of Vegas's dialogue over gifs of Kinn.

[jennilah]

I think i started to follow you bc of tiny!cas, like eons ago, let me tell you seeing you get into different fandoms over the years has been a delight.

I remember seeing post of you going like 'hey these slasher film kinda go hard' and look at you know.

I mean this in the best way possible, I feel i've been watching a house plant grow, every now and then catching my attention and being amazed by the changes

omg thats such a sweet way of describing my... well happy autism awareness day everyone, its a nice way of describing the way i naturally transition through my Special Interests lmfao

actually, for the holiday, let me infodump about this very aspect of my brain to anyone who isnt aware how this works for me. (also every autistic person is different, so this is just how this symptom manifests in me)

ill say "phases" to simplify, though thats an unfair word because it implies im "over" my past phases. 99% of my past phases are pretty much there for life, but in the back of my mind. (So long as I didnt have a "bad breakup" with it for some reason, which is rare but happens) The ability to become a raving lunatic about it is dormant until someone asks the right question.

There can only be one interest (sometimes 2, with one being the less dominant one) at the forefront of my brain at a time, though. that defines the "phase".

so for example, my recent Halloween phase is "over" and I am 100% fully into Saw now, but I still absolutely love Halloween and Michael and Jason and all those guys. as evident by me still happily sharing gifsets and art and buying merch etc if it tickles my fancy. They're just hanging out in the background of my mental display case.

yea whoever follows my tumblr for a very long time has watched it happen in realtime. the transition between interests. i know for a fact which phase I started this blog on. if you're here from the beginning, youve seen, in order:

-Durarara!! -Deus Ex -Supernatural -Godzilla -Detroit: Become Human -There was like a few weeks where it was HLVRAI -And then it was plants. There was a year-long stretch with no Special Interest and I was latching onto odd things (and I was very inactive here) -Halloween & Friday the 13th -and now, Saw

I have many other things I love, but they don't clamp around my brain in quite the same extreme way.

my phases can last any amount of time, anywhere from a few short intense months to 5+ years, its completely random, completely unpredictable. even the interest itself is impossible to predict. its not something i choose, its something that happens to me.

sometimes i avoid watching things for a long time because im still very emotionally attached to my current phase and im genuinely afraid the shiny new thing will replace it. all art or fic ideas for the previous phase? theyll be abandoned. all I will want to create will be related to the new thing. (though I will sometimes draw it anyway, like digging up old toys to play with once in a while. The likelihood just drops considerably)

which is why right now i pretty much put a pause on the other franchises I plan on watching. I'm genuinely gripping onto Saw like someone is tryin to take it from me.

and then sometimes im like "haha yeah right. ill be fine. ill eat my shoe if my brain latches to this" and then put on the movie and by the credits roll im a new person (yes thats what happened with Saw. I really had no idea.)

this is also why im terrified of even just "checking out" things that have, like, a toxic fanbase or something, because i cant stop a new phase from happening if it does. and its really hard to keep it to myself, fuck

(do u know how mad i was when i realized i was attaching to hoffman the evil dirty cop??? i was so scared of drawing him, dudes. but thankfully everyones been cool abt it and we're all very aware of his awfulness & we have fun w it)

and every time my brain changes and i do get obsessed with some new thing, i get really scared and worried and hope I dont bother everyone who followed me for something else :(((( and yet, every time, im absolutely floored by how many people choose to tolerate my newest nonsense and stick around anyway

anyway ive lost the plot of what point i was making here OH YEAH thank you!

tl;dr: that would be the autism! thank you, it WILL happen again! that is a threat! 🥰

[jokaarija]

Top five moments what made you go "yeah that boy is not straight" about Bojan? (for science)

ohh hello there 👀 sorry for the late reply btw!! so i’m not gonna be doing a ranking per se, this is just a list

(if you wanna take this seriously or not it’s up to you, these are just my silly Thoughts and Feelings) alright let’s goo

1. the use of gender neutral language when asked about romantic relationships/girls which is very very hard to do in slovene or any other gendered language. he goes out of his way to do it which is interesting but at the same time i really appreciate that he’s normalizing it

2. this is just how i remember the translation being but when asked in this interview about esc being a lgbtq event, and wether or not they want to experiment with that, bojan said “i believe that for now i’m not tempted”. the fact that he used “for now” was very interesting to me, he pretty much leaves room for anything to happen in his future, he’s not completely ruling that out and i love that for him!! note that this interview was before the pre parties and everything which leads me to my next point

3. jere. i can’t even choose one moment just.. jere, he IS the moment!! if you were to tell me he was the reason bojan had a sexuality crisis/awakening i wouldn’t bat an eyelash:)) also, i have no idea how bojan was before esc, this whole thing is basically me projecting, but i wouldn’t be surprised if being around jere, and the eurovision experience in general made him more comfortable to express himself

4. marco mengoni. yes, hear me out!! (this can also be read as him having crushes on other men in general) inspired by an interview where bojan goes “marco mengoni ahhhhh 😩” i made a gifset with some of their moments together that never saw the light of day so here u go

interesting, interesting

5. this is probably gonna be my favorite but god he really enjoys getting on the floor for other men doesn’t he? 😭 and the examples are plenty!! tavastia 1.0, him being stepped on, the countless of times he gets on his knees on stage in front of men? yeah yeah

honorable mention: kris being the number one supporter of the bojan is not straight agenda 🫶

[kcrabb88]

🥤🌻🍄🏜️ (if you don’t mind doing many!)

🥤⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

Gonna give my wonderful friend @tired-bshocked a shout out here! She's got some great Star Wars fics (including a super interesting follow up to my fics, Shoulder the Sky and Whispers From the Dead)

Also, for the Les Mis side of things, I was going through my bookmarks the other day and remembering how much I love @lemeute's fics. ALWAYS a good bet.

🌻 ⇢ tag someone you appreciate but don't talk to on a regular basis

@mid-nighttiger is a lovely mutual who has wonderful opinions and is an all-around great follow! <3

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

I saw a Pirates of the Caribbean gifset I liked earlier and it got me thinking about Will and Elizabeth and my headcanon that in-between the first and second movies, pre-wedding, Elizabeth was constantly trying to seduce Will and he was like "no! I couldn't POSSIBLY! Not before we are WED!" because he's just. Like that. Even though he wants to. I feel like Dead Man's Chest validates this idea because Elizabeth is SO frustrated about her wedding night getting interrupted lmao.

🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

I adore it when people copy/paste bits of the fic and then say what they liked about them, or just flail at me. Those are truly god-tier comments and some of my favorite kind to get!

[astro-b-o-y-d]

Yet another Boyd Drake Propaganda Post from yours truly, specifically for the @eggcrackerbracket​​ tournament this time:

First of all, he’s a robot Pinocchio allusion who decided he was a definitely real boy and then he WAS one. We all know robots and Pinocchio allusions are so trans of gender, and so being both makes him extra trans of gender!

Literally uses the phrase ‘I’m Boyd, a Definitely Real Boy!’ to introduce himself. 🥺🥺🥺

The entirety of Astro BOYD involves him fighting to be seen as a regular boy rather than a killing machine. He even fights against the programming of an evil scientist trying to use him as a weapon and MAKES THE CHOICE to be a real boy. His transgenderism is so strong, he can even fight against evil programming that is trying to control him and WIN.

Astro BOYD as a whole could very well be an allegory for what it’s like to be neurodivergent, in addition to being an allegory for being transgender. Him and Huey Duck are clearly autistic-coded, and the phrase ‘He’s a kid like me, just wired a little differently’ is used. 

They’re also best friends and spend a chunk of the episode taking a tour of furry Tokyo to do research for a shared special interest. (Also I like to imagine it doubles as a date for them, because cute 🥺).

Huey also spends the entire episode reaffirming Boyd’s desire to be seen as a real boy. He’s the best triplet for this reason alone.

Less happy fact about the episode, Boyd’s creator ends up misgendering him as ‘it’ for a spell and reject his claims of being a real boy because of some stuff that happens within the episode. 

But it’s fine because he’s going up to bat for him by the end and his reaffirmation of Boyd’s chosen identity is what ends up saving the day in the end. (Also Gyro is pretty trans-coded himself so we’ll let it slide but it still took me a while to come around on him as a character 😒).

Even before this episode aired, I already had such a soft spot for Boyd. I literally only started watching the show because I saw GIFsets of a previous episode with him, and he was just so PRECIOUS (and gave me Angus McDonald vibes) so I knew I had to watch the show just so I could get to his debut episode. And then Astro BOYD came along and cemented his place as my absolute favorite character in the show, and probably one of my favorite characters of all time.

Anyway I was lightly dipping my toes into a they/them enby identity before this episode dropped, but after months of having Boyd as a comfort character after the episode aired, a LOT of things began to click for me internally. And now here I am, a he/they transmasc with one of my chosen names being Boyd. (Listen I know technically I was already not-cis before that, but he still absolutely played a big part in delivering the final blow to my egg and helping me settle comfortably into a transmasc identity).

Also one final fact; Scrooge McDuck inspired Astro Boy, the first anime character. And then Ducktales made Boyd, an homage to Astro Boy as a whole. So Boyd is technically only a few steps away from the invention of anime. He deserves some respect for that fact alone from those of you who got their egg cracked by an anime character.

Okay I’m done now. Vote for the boy who cracked my egg because he is so polite and sweet and a definitely real boy and he deserves to at least get past round one 🥺🥺🥺

Also also if you want, watch Ducktales 2017 because it’s pretty fun. Or just watch Astro BOYD, because it’s the best episode. Sorry DWD fans, I know where my loyalties lie.

Also ALSO ALSO in case a DT fan who doesn’t know me might ask why I said Boyd DRAKE:

(Okay now I’m really, REALLY done for now, promise. Mainly bc this post is getting super long and I have a few others drafted before the contest has even started. #BOYDSWEEP)

[tarisilmarwen]

Rebels Rewatch: “Rise of the Old Masters“

Happy Father’s Day!  Rather appropriately we are talking about a keystone Kanan-Ezra episode today.  I swear I didn’t plan that, just how the timing worked out, lol.

Anyway...

I briefly mentioned this in my coverage of “Spark of Rebellion” but one of the reoccurring elements that tend to crop up in all my favorite characters (because I’m horribly predictable and have a Type) is:

“Has complicated yet ultimately heartwarming storgeic relationship with (surrogate) father figure.”

Soooooooo yeah, Kanan and Ezra pretty much hit me right in that particular button.

Poor Kanan fumbling with the lessons that came so instinctively to him. XD

“Actually that one always confused me too.”  Love that Kanan can admit it.

Kanan’s approach is almost adorable in how inept it is, he’s just kind of throwing things against the wall hoping something will stick.  In perhaps the worst environment to do any of this.

(Seriously Kanan, on top of the Ghost, while it’s in midair?!  Disaster was inevitable.)

Hhhngl, look how Ezra’s eyes light up when Kanan offers him the lightsaber, he’s so eager for this.

Another quick instance of Ezra flinching as if anticipating being hit, watch close and you can see he ducks his head as well as squeezes his eyes closed briefly.

Kanan forgot to teach good weapons safety lol.

Ezra actually gets a few cartons when he peeks. :)

Aaaaaand down he goes, certain unmentioned uncharitable portions of fandom will not let up on Kanan about this particular series of mistakes.

Is practicing on top of the Ghost irresponsible child endangerment?  Yes but... that’s literally the point?????  Kanan has no idea what he’s doing and makes horrible mistakes left and right?????  That’s why he’s so afraid and reluctant to teach Ezra?????  That’s his whole motivation for wanting to go get Luminara?????

Oh but if characters do not relate to each other absolutely perfectly without any friction or conflict or mistakes whatsoever that’s horrible and toxic.

Said at least one Maul stan without a hint of irony.

Okay, done salting, let’s enjoy this moment of Ezra trying to play it cool in front of Sabine despite being in eminent danger of falling to his death.

“What, no, this is nothing.  I’m fine.” XD

Fun fact: Pretty sure a gifset of this moment was one of the first Rebels-related posts I ever saw on my dashboard.

Hera looks very concerned here, lol.

And our first glimpse of what a Loth-cat looks like.  Cutest addition to the Star Wars menagerie ever.

Ezra’s theme is piping in here, fragmented and quiet.

*resists the urge to go into another ranting paragraph about how uncharitable parties in fandom use this scene to argue that the Ghost crew are actually terrible towards Ezra and don’t care about him properly*

Once again, everything in the eyes.  So much is unspoken but conveyed with just a look.

Friiiiiiick his expression here breaks my heart.

Casually referencing the events of last episode which should have been fandom’s first clue that it was more narratively tied into things than they thought and also introducing a new story element that plays out later.  I don’t remember what I thought about Gall Trayvis the first time around, I’m pretty sure I found it weird and fishy though.

Ha ha ha the casual Fridge Horror of the Imperial broadcaster talking about a “planetary liberation” via Base Delta Zero protocol.

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO MIGHT NOT KNOW: Base Delta Zero is basically code for “Have a bunch of Star Destroyers systematically incinerate everything on a planet’s surface from orbit.”

Soooooo yeah, there’s probably not much left of that particular “liberated” world.

Kind of interesting that Ezra chooses to confide in Chopper about his fears here.

I do like the nice cloud effects.

Kanan is in a very serious mood here, one we haven’t seen from him yet.  Speaks to the depths of how badly he wants this to succeed.

Badass Stormtrooper takedown immediately ruined by feral gremlin child. <3

Aaaaaand yet another instance of Ezra flinching like he expects Kanan to hit him.  Just what exactly caused such a pronounced startle effect, exactly?

Don’t think about bby Ezra growing up on the streets, don’t think about bby Ezra growing up on the streets--

Ezra looks so crestfallen here ow ow ow ow. :(

Hera shivers as if it’s cold, which could be taken straightforwardly but also I like to think she senses the bad vibes about the place.

Oh hey, now’s a good time to remind people of the horrible headcanon theory someone sent me about why Kanan can still sense Luminara even though she’s dead.

You’re welcome.

LOOK AT THIS TIRED FATHER AND HIS THREE HORRIBLE CHILDREN.  Love how Zeb and Sabine openly roast him while he’s right there, terrible influences on Ezra the both of you. XD

Snrk, the one Stormtrooper getting his helmet caught in the lift doors lololol.

The music has been periodically sparse throughout this episode, the quiet parts giving all focus to dialogue, but it’s picked up quite a bit here.

I hear the Force Theme strings prelude of course.

It is physically painful how much Ezra already hero-worships Kanan and looks up to him.  He didn’t want to learn how to be a Jedi from just anyone, he wanted to learn from Kanan specifically because thinks Kanan is so cool and amazing.  Ezra is constantly in awe of him this episode.

But, I mean, is it any wonder that an emotionally vulnerable teenage boy with deeply-seated abandonment issues would latch onto the first available and positive adult male influence in his life?

The Force theme coming in more fully here to trick us right before the horrible reveal, though the way it sours on the end note is a little five-second musical foreshadowing.

Hi Grand, bringing the Imperial March with you I see.

And then his theme breaks in after the commercial break cut and lemme just appreciate it again, it’s so nicely dark and foreboding.  That tiny little snatch of Force Theme on the trumpet can barely be heard through it, it’s too overpowering.

Grand refrains from going for an easy kill several times this fight.  He likes to play with his food, apparently.  Even toying with Kanan he’s waaaaaay outclassing him, very neat and precise fencing strokes here.

Kanan’s heavy flailing is actually very at odds with his supposed preferred form, Soresu, Form 3, a primarily reflective and defensive form, which makes Grand’s comment about him being a poor student sting a bit more.

Lololol my man doesn’t even flinch at Ezra’s slingshot bolts.

Hngl the smoke element is fantastic here.  Watch it waft around Kanan and Ezra as they run through it.  This is not the kind of effect work you usually get on CGI kids cartoon shows.

Kanan’s form actually improves a bit after the cutaway, his footing is more solid and he’s expending less effort, making his blocking stances more effective at turning back Grand’s blade.  So that jibe from Grand apparently kicked Kanan’s brain into focus.

Oh yep, all those troopers are dead, that is not a survivable explosion.

Kanan’s managing the spinny Jedi flips now; he’s untensing and likely falling back into muscle memory and connection to the Force.  I love how Star Wars tends to depict Jedi survivors getting back into practice after they haven’t picked up their sabers or connected to the Force in a long while, awkward at first but slowly getting the hang of it again, remembering their training, moving through basics into more complex moves until they’re comfortable again.  I know A New Dawn also depicts Kanan tapping into the Force as straining a muscle that hasn’t been used in a while, nice consistency across the board there.

“He is unfocused and undisciplined.”  “Well then we’re perfect for each other!”

And one of my favorite Papa Wolf Kanan moments right here when Kanan slams Grand up against the ceiling. :)

The Force Theme is finally louder and more confident here and Grand’s has taken a pause.

Buuuuuuut it’s soon back in force lol.

I dunno what it is but I really love the animation in Grand’s unflinching run through the closing doors here, even when he has to leap over them he doesn’t even break stride.

Ezra’s slicing and lockpicking skills kind of fall by the wayside as he focuses more on Jedi training, which is kind of a shame, I liked that he was a bit tech-savvy in ways Sabine wasn’t.

Why I like to include little moments here and there in my fics where he still gets to use his talents.

Can I appreciate this little moment of Sabine reaching for him in concern?

Of course I can, who’s going to stop me?

And one of my favorite master-padawan moments right here, Kanan finally giving some solid instruction (”Picture the locking mechanism in your mind.��), doing it with him, and it’s something easy that Ezra can already do albeit on a bigger scale.

A very victorious Force Theme to mark the occasion. :)

Something Rebels does when it needs to emphasize Kanan and Ezra’s connection is basically have them mirror each other’s pose, this is one of the first examples.  Ezra’s straining a little bit more in his expression but they’re perfectly in sync and mirror-matched limb for limb.

WHICH DOESN’T NECESSARILY MAKE THE PARALLELED IMAGERY IN THE FINALE HURT MORE BUT IT ADDS A LAYER.

Ohhhhhhh hang on, does anyone wonder if Hera leading the tibedees here was inspiration for the eventual purrgil surprise?

It’s on theme at least, lol.

I hear the “Rebels Shenanigans” leitmotif here, bit more dramatic than normal, lovely.

Ezra’s theme coming in as we return to Lothal and man, there’s really nothing I could say about this scene that hasn’t already been said, this is one of fandom’s favorites, we can all spill ink about Ezra’s fear of abandonment and Kanan’s sense of inadequacy and how the Force tends to bring together pairs that teach and grow each other.

How Kanan finally figures out and understands what Yoda’s “Do or do not” line means, how it’s all about your mental state, you can’t give up before you’ve started, you have to be all in and fully committed.

How he’s realizing he has to commit to this and not half-ass it and that leads him to adjust his strategy and go much slower and more meticulously in this lovely little last scene which has the distinct look and feel of a father and son playing catch in the yard. ^_^

Our first real “plot-heavy“ episode of the series, heavy on the drama and interpersonal character conflict.  Can see why it’s the episode that convinced a lot of people to stay on board.  It delves much more deeply into Kanan and Ezra’s master-padawan connection, the Found Family aspects of which are, of course, widely loved.  Their relationship was always one of the show’s strengths.  Like Ezra and Zeb’s friendship it starts off rocky but there’s an extra emotional and personal element in that Kanan is the teacher, the “parent”, and they’re both connected to the Force, something no one else can teach Ezra about.  Kanan has to be the one to guide Ezra through that learning process because he’s the only one who understands it, who can bring that aspect out of Ezra and make him truly who he is.

Kanan really starts to step up after this.  He’s still got a LOT of fears and worries and insecurities, as he’ll tell Yoda later, but he’s over his initial mental block now.  All the better for Ezra, for helping him feel wanted and safe. :)

Ahhhh I love this episode, the character growth from this point to the end is just *chef kiss*.  More worried spacedad Kanan up next week, hopefully I’ll have that post up quicker than this one.

Coming in last minute like my newborn last month oy.